Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Reality + Movies = Funny In A Drinking Game Kind Of Way

So...the wife and I have been watching the new FOX "reality" show On The Lot. I actually thought about entering this (you gotta be in it to win it), but decided to wait and see what the show is really like (especially after having entered something in two of the three Project: Greenlight runs).

Attempting to apply an American Idol concept to a filmmaking competition where the "winner" gets a million dollar deal at Dreamworks is kind of like applying it to the casting of a Broadway show (and I didn't even see that show...will two unknowns really have the draw to keep a show running on Broadway for long). The funny part is that the people "behind the scenes" in this "contest" have probably never made films they way these contestants are being forced to (anyone think Garry Marshall has ever been told go make a one minute comedy short in a week).

But the folks "playing the game" are up to the task even if it seems like most of them don't quite have the talent.

The first two episodes aired last week actually showed some promise as the top 50 filmmakers were whittled down to 36 after a pitch session (always tough...anyone think Spielberg still makes his own pitches...or Garry Marshall). Those 36 were then put in teams of 3 to create a short film in 24 hours. Each team member got to direct one scene in each short. There was some good drama and tension involved here and at the end of this round we were down to 24 people.

The next challenge was each of these people were given an hour to direct a page of dialog from a script using a full film crew. There would be 6 people eliminated from this leaving us with 18. But we never got to see any of this as the third episode of the show opened with 18 contestants who each had to make a one minute comedy short. So FOX spent 2 hours on Monday night introducing us to each filmmaker, showing their shorts and having the judges comment on them.

Of the 18 shorts there were 4 really good ones, a whole bunch of ones that were either cute or competent and little more, one head scratcher (meaning what was the filmmaker thinking...the character in the film came off more retarded than "nerdy" just as the judges said) and two films that were so off the mark you knew who was going home the next night.

But let it never be said that American voters are predictable. Only one of the truly "bad" filmmakers went home. The other miraculously stayed. The other two who were voted off were foreigners (so much for the international contingent). And the headscratcher of a film wound up in the top 3???

While the show is an interesting attempt at finding new talent to make Hollywood films, I'm not sure this is the best way to do it. But it is kind of fun to watch...if only to make a drinking game out of the flubs, hand gestures and general stupidity of host Adrianna Costa (who did she fuck to get this job...she's easily the worst host in the entire history of the concept of hosting). If you toss in every time Garry Marshall references how we need more women directors like his sister Penny, you'll be drunk off your ass within ten minutes.

I told my wife that if there's a second run of this show next year to push my ass into at least submitting a film. I'm betting FOX will only stick with the entire first run if they're contractually obligated to. It seems Univision has been getting better ratings.

Be seeing you


Friday, May 25, 2007

It Was 30 Years Ago Today...

So, Star Wars is 30 years old. Was I really only 8 when I first saw it? Did I really see it 4 times in the theaters? Did my mom really stand up in the middle of the movie when Darth Vader and Ben Kenobi were duelling and shout "Go get him Ben!" (or something to that effect)? Did she later have a fight in a toy store over a Princess Leia action figure?

You bet your asses.

Its kind of scary that this "little" film not only changed how people saw movies, but also how Hollywood made movies.

This amazing juggernaut of a film pretty much birthed the modern summer blockbuster as we know it (and one could argue that the first of the "Prequel" Trilogy killed it in certain respects, but that's another argument for another time).

For me, it was a way of life for a long time. I LOVED Star Wars. I was able to procure (with the help of a crazy mom) every action figure made. It was the starting point of my crazy obsessions that I still try to rid myself of to this day (lets just say that as soon as I get over the daunting task of cleaning off all those old toys, they're gonna go on eBay...my love for them has been replaced by other things -- a wife, a son, a sixth scale Jabba the Hutt).

But I couldn't just let today pass without making mention (not that I'm unique on this respect, there's a whole weekend long convention to mark the damn celebration)...

Partially because I was admonished by a friend for not screening the original trilogy this weekend...but the projector's broken (the latest in a long line of electronic problems we've had at the house since February) and there are other things going on.

I was going to make more than a mention and really wax philosophic about the film (and its sequels)...but I'm honestly all tapped out on this subject right now. I don't have the desire or energy beyond saying what I've barely said.

Be seeing you.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

FOX 2006-2007 Review/2007-2008 Preview

And lastly, FOX gives us their new fall lineup (and then some)...

GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN
Drive -- 1 Season/6 Episodes/2 Unaired (but scheduled for July 4) -- This was a sad story of a fun show that FOX pulled way too quickly. This serious version of The Cannonball Run had enough action, suspense, drama and humor to keep it going for a full season. I'm not even sure why FOX canned it...I didn't think the ratings were that bad. At least we'll get to see the last two episodes (which I'm sure don't wrap up anything, but at least we can see where things were headed).

Happy Hour -- 1 Season/6 Episodes/2 Unaired -- Anyone other than me remember this? I barely remember this. That's a good thing.

Justice -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/1 Unaired -- Why do networks air all but one episode of a show? Can't they at least give the handful of fans the last drops of joy? Okay...this show wasn't great, but it was good...heck...anything with Victor Garber is good.

The O.C. -- 4 Seasons/92 Episodes -- I know this was popular, but I never even bothered. If they were 8 episodes shy of the magic 100 for syndication there's gotta be something wrong here.

The Rich List -- 1 Season/4 Episodes/3 Unaired -- I blinked and missed it. What was this about?

Vanished -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/4 Unaired (but streamed online) -- This wasn't a bad show, but the concept was kind of all over the place (Kidnapped meets The DaVinci Code by way of The Bourne Identity). Apparently there was enough time after the cancellation announcement to wrap up the plot involving the kidnapped Senator's wife...sort of...It was a fun mess to watch, but a mess never-the-less as the wife escaped and went back to her old boyfriend, but the cabal of evil people running the country is still there (aren't they always).

The Wedding Bells -- 1 Season/7 Episodes/2 Unaired -- Didn't watch it.

Nanny 911 -- 2 Seasons/24 Episodes -- So we've fixed all the bratty kids in the country? Didn't think so.

Trading Spouses -- 3 Seasons/60 Episodes -- Apparently everyone's swapped at this point...at least those who wanted to...I should have been able to come up with something funnier, but it's been a long month.

The War At Home -- 2 Seasons/44 Episodes -- There is a G-d!

The Winner -- 1 Season/6 Episodes -- This weirdly funny show deserved a better chance. Heck, I found the opening of the pilot to be very unfunny and then the show slowly got much funnier...in a creepy kind of way. I'm sure Rob Cordry will get more work...somehow.

The Loop -- 2 Seasons -- I'm unsure of how many total episodes there will be of this show. The second season doesn't start until June, but since Bret Harrison has a new show next season, I don't expect there to be a third season. The first season of 7 episodes is available on DVD and its a pretty funny show. Hopefully, season 2 will be just as funny (and warrant a DVD release as well).

Standoff -- 1 Season/19 Episodes/8 Unaired -- The rest of this show will be burned off this summer. It was a feeble attempt to redo the success of Bones with hostage negotiators. It didn't work.

Like last year, FOX has given us three different schedules, so some days have multiple listings as the shows rotate through the season.

MONDAYS (September to January)
8pm Prison Break -- Back for a third season of logic defying suspense, at least the show can live up to its title again as Michael, former guard Bellick, former FBI Agent Mahoney and psycho T-Bag are now in a Panama prison instead of running all over the country (actually continent...well...hemisphere). Should be fun, but I don't know how much life the premise has in it.
9pm K-Ville -- A cop show set in post-Katrina New Orleans starring Anthony Anderson? Its a good thing there are other hour long shows ready to go and be moved into this slot (I predict The Sarah Connor Chronicles will air much earlier than expected).

MONDAYS (January to March)
8pm K-Ville
9pm 24 -- Back for a seventh season. I think its time to call shennanigans on this show. This current season about to end started with Jack arriving on a plane from China after 18 months of being tortured in a Chinese prison and having to stop more nukes from going off on American soil within two hours of landing. I know when I get off a plane after a six hour flight from visiting family in California, I'm pretty sure the last thing I want to be doing is running around after nuclear terrorists...I usually just want to take a nice long dump in a clean quiet bathroom. I think Jack Bauer needs to do the same.

MONDAYS (March to May)
8pm Prison Break
9pm 24

TUESDAYS (September to January)
8pm New Amsterdam -- FOX gets an award for sheer balls on even airing this show starring a cast of unknowns and created by a foreign art film director. Lasse Hallstrom (My Life As A Dog) brings us a tale of a cop who is immortal. You bet your ass I'm gonna check this one out.
9pm House M.D. -- The cranky doctor returns for a 4th season of cantankerous fun.

TUESDAYS (January to May)
8pm American Idol -- The juggernaut that is dumbing down music even more than Brittany Spears returns for a 7th round. It amazes me that more people vote for the winner of this show than do in our Presidential elections. Maybe next season should pit Rudy, Hillary, Barack and the gang against each other?
9pm House M.D.

WEDNESDAYS (September to January)
8pm Back To You -- Kelsey Grammar and Patricia Heaton star as an on air news team with little off air chemistry. Toss in Fred Willard and how can you go wrong? I hope they don't, but one would have said the same thing about a show starring John Lithgow and Jeffrey Tambour.
8:30 Til Death -- While I'm a bit shocked this show starring Brad Garrett as a hen pecked husband got a second season, I think its nice that FOX has let it grow a bit over the first season. I may try again in the fall. It wasn't bad, just typical.
9pm Bones -- The grossest show on TV returns for a third season. Its still fun to watch the chemistry between the leads.

WEDNESDAYS (January to March)
8pm Back To You
8:30 Til Death
9pm American Idol

WEDNESDAYS (March to May)
8pm Back To You
8:30 The Return Of Jezebel James -- Parker Posey and Lauren Ambrose as sisters. Could be worth a viewing based on the talent...luckily, we've got some time to think it over.
9pm American Idol (Results Show)
9:30 Til Death

THURSDAYS (September to January)
8pm Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader? -- If you made it through the public education system past the 5th grade and are watching this show, probably not.
9pm Kitchen Nightmares -- The chef of Hell's Kitchen takes his show on the road as he goes to restaurants in trouble and offers them his brand of help. Whatever.

THURSDAYS (January to May)
8pm Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?
9pm Canterbury's Law -- Executive producers Dennis Leary and Jim Serpico tackle the courtroom drama with Juliana Margulies as a lawyer who is missing justice in her own life as her young son disappeared a few years ago. Do we need another courtroom drama?

FRIDAYS (September to January)
8pm The Search For The Next Great American Band -- Not being content with finding one new singer, the creators of American Idol are now looking to put together a whole group of musicians to work together. Good luck.
9pm Nashville -- The creators of Laguna Beach are apparently going south...in more ways than one. Ugh.

FRIDAYS (January to May)
8pm Bones
9pm New Amsterdam

SATURDAYS
8pm Cops -- Starts a 20th Season in the fall.
9pm America's Most Wanted -- Starts a 22nd Season of righting wrongs and bringing criminals to justice.

SUNDAYS
7pm The OT -- Finally! FOX just went ahead and officially gave the whole fucking hour to the NFL instead of teasing us who don't care with "episodes already in progress" of our favorite animated families. Let's just hope they don't go over the hour.
8pm The Simpsons -- Going out of its 18th Season into a Feature Film and into its 19th Season is an amazing feat. Doing it with style, grace and barely a loss of wit and humor is something else all together. Here's to more features and 19 more seasons. D'oh!
8:30 King Of The Hill -- This show will be starting its 12th season in the fall. Its like Coach only animated. You're amazed its still on, but its barely changed and still entertains a few people on occassion.
9pm Family Guy -- The TV show that refused to die returns for a 6th rip-roaring, pop-culture reference filled season. Woo Hoo!
9:30 American Dad -- What started off a bit shaky has gotten better, but still has a ways to go. Maybe the third season will get even better.

SUNDAYS (January to May)
7pm King Of The Hill
7:30 American Dad
8pm The Simpsons
8:30 Family Guy
9pm The Sarah Connor Chronicles -- Ever curious what happened between Terminator 2: Judgment Day and Terminator 3: Rise Of The Machines? Didn't think so. But here's where you'll find out. Could be good...we'll see.

MIDSEASON
The Rules For Starting Over -- The Farrelly Brothers bring us this sitcom about a group of late 30 somethings who find themselves single again and starting life over. Meh.

Anchorwoman -- This unscripted "reality" series is about a news director who brings in a WWE hottie to be his new anchorwoman...much to the dismay of his current one. I have no idea what to think of this monstrosity beyond staying far far far away.

Well...that's all for the five major TV networks. I'll be back tomorrow with a round up of everything and a look at how we'll be scheduling our Tivo & two cable DVRs in the fall.

Be seeing you.

The CW 2006-2007 Review/2007-2008 Preview

Today you get two Fugues for the price of one...first up is The CW with their new fall lineup.

GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN
Gilmore Girls -- After 7 Seasons and 153 Episodes, this popular show decided to end its run. Never really caught it.

Reba -- Six Seasons and 125 Episodes later, this guilty pleasure ends while its still a good show, which is smart. Leave 'em wanting more...or having had just enough.

Runaway -- 1 Season/8 Episodes/5 Unaired -- I blinked and missed it...apparently so did everyone else.

Seventh Heaven -- 11 Seasons/243 Episodes -- I'm glad its gone...it should have been gone when it had its "Series Finale" at the end of the 10th Season, but The CW decided to entice their most popular show back for at least one more run to launch their "First" Season (after UPN and The WB merged). I'm still angry that this decision was what caused the wonderfully quirky, yet heart-warming Everwood to be cancelled. So I rejoice that this show is gone. Hooray!

All Of Us -- 4 Seasons/88 Episodes -- What was this show about? Never saw it.

Veronica Mars -- 3 Seasons/64 Episodes -- OK...so it's not "officially" gone yet. Its not on the schedule for next season, but the contracts aren't up until June 15, so the network is taking a bit longer to decide what to do with the show. IF it does come back, expect BIG changes (like its four years later and Veronica's now an FBI agent changes). This was a great show and while I'd love to see it continue, its ok if it goes out in style.

Hidden Palms -- 1 Season/8 Episodes -- OK...the show hasn't aired yet (it premieres at the end of May), but don't expect this teen soap to go anywhere beyond the episodes shot so far. If The CW had real faith in it, they would have premiered it earlier like originally planned. Of course, stranger things have happened in network TV.

MONDAYS
8pm Everybody Hates Chris -- This funny show that I rarely watch returns for a 3rd season.
8:30 Aliens In America -- A sitcom about a family that takes in a foreign exchange student expecting a blonde-haired, blue-eyed Northern European and wind up with a Pakistani Muslim. Hilarity ensues as the geeky daughter and her new friend navigate the perils of high school together.
9pm Girlfriends -- A show I've never watched returns for an 8th season.
9:30 The Game -- And another show I've never watched returns for a 2nd season.

TUESDAYS
8pm Beauty And The Geek -- This funny "reality" series returns for a 4th season.
9pm Reaper -- Brett Harrison (of The Loop and Grounded For Life) stars as Sam a guy who discovers that his parents sold his soul to Satan and now that he's turned 21, Satan (played by Ray Wise of Twin Peaks fame) gives Sam a new job...as a bounty hunter tracking down evil souls who have escaped from hell. With Kevin Smith as an executive producer and the talented cast and wacky idea, I'm looking forward to this show. It'll definitely get three episodes.

WEDNESDAYS
8pm America's Next Top Model -- Returns for a 9th "Season" of wacky Tyra Banks fun.
9pm Gossip Girl -- This show about a mysterious "blogger" and the reactions some prep school teens have to her "news" forms the basis for an ongoing mystery and melodrama.

THURSDAYS
8pm Smallville -- Returning for a 7th season, this show has been all over the place of late. But I'll keep watching if only because I've already invested so much time in it and to see where everyone is headed. I can't imagine there being a season beyond the next one (and if there is, it will be Lex Luthor-less because Michael Rosenbaum will not return), but I'm still along for the ride.
9pm Supernatural -- The show returns for a 3rd season and I still won't watch it as I'm not a big fan of the lead actor (he pretty much ruined all of Smallville's 4th Season).

FRIDAYS
8pm WWE Smackdown -- Returns for a 9th Season of homo-erotic fun (or is it a second season since this is The CW's second season...the previous 7 seasons were technically on UPN...although when did WWF become WWE? Maybe its really only the 4th season of WWE Smackdown as the first 5 seasons may have been WWF Smackdown? Does anyone really care?)

SATURDAYS
No Programming -- Thank G-d!!!!

SUNDAYS
7pm Online Nation -- Ugh...it's what you get if Bratz made Access Hollywood. More news about Paris Hilton and Britany Spears than you can shake a stick at (and stick shaking is much more fun than watching this crap).
7:30 CW Now -- Imagine if YouTube had its own TV series. Ouch...my brain hurts!
8pm Life Is Wild -- Did you ever wonder what Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman would have been like if she were a modern day male vet living in South Africa? No...well...you can find out anyway by watching this new show. Blah.
9pm America's Next Top Model (Repeats) -- Yay! Even more of Tyra! Ya know...in case you missed it the first time.

MIDSEASON
Crowned: The Mother Of All Pageants -- Mother-Daughter teams compete for pageant crowns. Don't they do this in pageants anyway? Why do we need to shit up our airwaves with this?

Farmer Wants A Wife -- Imagine if The Bachelor was for white trash. What do you mean it already is? No...I meant the contestants, not the viewers.

One Tree Hill -- Returns for a 5th Season?? How did that happen??

Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search For The Next Doll -- Returns for a second season but even G-d doesn't know why.


OK...back later today with FOX's new lineup...and then a wrap-up/review of next season tomorrow.

Be seeing you (shortly).

CBS 2006-2007 Review/2007-2008 Preview

Today we get CBS' new fall lineup...so let's take a look back first...

GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN
3 Lbs. -- 1 Season/8 Episodes/5 Unaired -- I like Stanley Tucci, but I honestly had zero interest in this House clone.

The King of Queens -- 9 Seasons/207 Episodes -- I first saw this show before it aired as part of a focus group. It was entertaining, but nothing special. I did watch the show during its first season, but once my boycott of CBS took effect, the show was off my radar. When I finally came back to watch CBS (last season), I never bothered to jump back in to this show. The reruns were fluff to watch when there was nothing else on. I did catch the final episode. The show went out the way it came in...quietly and in the shadow of greater shows.

Smith -- 1 Season/7 Episodes/4 Unaired -- CBS pulled this show quickly and luckily ran the unaired episodes online. They also posted a document detailing where the show would have gone after those episodes made. Its too bad this show barely got off the ground. Both my wife and I enjoyed it a lot. Maybe a DVD release will come out of this at some point.

Waterfront -- This show never even got to air. Five episodes were shot of this Joe Pantoliano detective show. We'll never know what it was really like (let's face it, do TV executives really know what makes a good show...)

Armed & Famous -- 1 Season/7 Episodes/3 Unaired -- People who got rejected from The Surreal Life are given a badge and a gun? I don't think so.

The Class -- 1 Season/19 Episodes -- Never saw it. Got nothing to say about it.

Close To Home -- 2 Seasons/44 Episodes -- Never saw it, but now maybe the talented Jennifer Finnegan can become a regular on The Dead Zone because her two appearances so far have been fun.

Jericho -- 1 Season/22 Episodes -- This is the biggest shame of the season. What started off as a hit show quickly became an example of how not to air a serialized show. The break between November and February killed the momentum (which is why FOX made 24 a mid-season show and ABC is doing the same with Lost next season). Its too bad. This was a good strong show right to its very end...which will never be resolved...let's hope the upcoming DVD release contains some sort of resolution.

Rock Star -- 2 Seasons/54 Episodes -- They couldn't get Ringo and Paul to put together a band for a third season??

MONDAYS
8pm How I Met Your Mother -- Returns for a 3rd Season. I don't watch.
8:30 The Big Bang Theory -- Two physics geeks meet a hottie. Sure, I'm simplifying the premise, but its a sitcom...who wants more than that. I'll be passing.
9pm Two And A Half Men -- Returns for a 5th Season. Meh.
9:30 Rules Of Engagement -- Returns for a 2nd Season. The evil that is David Spade is stronger than the good that is Patrick Warburton...so I don't watch.
10pm CSI: Miami -- Returns for a 6th Season. I was watching this on DVD for a while, but got bored.

TUESDAYS
8pm NCIS -- This is returning for a 5th Season? Yikes.
9pm The Unit -- Returning for a 3rd Season and there's no real good reason I'm not watching. I love the cast and the creators...but just couldn't find the time or energy.
10pm Cane -- Jimmy Smits, Hector Elizondo and Nestor Carbonal star in a new Latino soap. Good cast, blah premise. But what does this mean for Carbonal's character on Lost? With two episodes to go this season and him on a new show next season I smell another corpse.

WEDNESDAYS
8pm Kid Nation -- Easily one of the most bizarre reality shows ever. Forty kids ages 8 thru 15 are sent to a ghost town to build their own society with no adults involved. Can they prove to everyone they can do better than their elders or is this just a real life Lord Of The Flies? The potential for the latter will make this one to watch.
9pm Criminal Minds -- Its still kind of pedestrian, but the cast keeps me enthralled (when I remember to catch up on it...I've been a bit lax this past season and with the Tivo and the cable DVR both needing repairs during sweeps periods it became tough to keep track of everything). This will be the shows 3rd Season.
10pm CSI: NY -- Returning for a 4th Season, this should be the one in the franchise I watch since I do like the cast a lot...but I don't anymore...only so many TV watching hours in a day.

THURSDAYS
8pm Survivor -- 15 "Seasons" and still going strong. Blah.
9pm CSI -- The grand daddy of the franchise. Coming up on Season 8.
10pm Without A Trace -- Coming up on a 6th Season, this is another show I should like but don't watch (it started during my boycott years). Oh well.

FRIDAYS
8pm Ghost Whisperer -- I picked Medium and I'm not even sticking with that one as it airs anymore. Going into a 3rd Season.
9pm Moonlight -- A vampire private eye. Meh. Maybe a one episode try...maybe...
10pm Numbers -- Going into a 4th Season and I don't watch.

SATURDAYS
8pm Crimetime Saturday -- Its reruns of all the crime shows. Blah
10pm 48 Hours Mystery

SUNDAYS
7pm 60 Minutes -- More liberal clap trap to keep Fox News on their toes and give us the real news.
8pm Viva Laughlin -- Hugh Jackman produces and has a recurring role in this mystery-drama-musical about a businessman running a casino and juggling family life. Sounds very interesting.
9pm Cold Case -- I have no idea what this show is even about but it's been on for 4 seasons. Holy crap.
10pm Shark -- Tried it, didn't care. Gets a 2nd season in spite of my not watching.

MIDSEASON
Swingtown -- Sounds like a TV series version of The Ice Storm set in Chicago. Meh.

The Amazing Race -- Returns for a 12th "Season". Now that's amazing!

Power of 10 -- A game show hosted by Drew Carey? What? No improv clubs want him anymore?

The New Adventures Of Old Christine -- Returning for a 3rd Season, but I still don't care for the lead.

Well...that's all for today...

Tomorrow FOX and The CW. Two Fugues in one day!

Be seeing you.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

ABC 2006-2007 Review/2007-2008 Preview

Today is ABC's day to unveil their new fall slate. And they truly run the gamut between a show I'm really excited to see and a show that I believe epitomizes EVERYTHING that is wrong with Network TV, media empires and life in general (to the point where I briefly considered removing ABC from my viewing habits entirely...but there are too many shows on that I enjoy watching and would miss). That being said...here we go...

GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN
Daybreak -- 1 Season/13 Episodes (7 Unaired) -- The show seemed too familiar for its own good and was better when Eliza Dushku played the part in Tru Calling.

The Great American Dream Vote -- 1 Season/5 Episodes (3 Unaired) -- Missed this one. Apparently so did everyone else.

In Case Of Emergency -- 1 Season/13 Episodes (1 Unaired) -- I saw a good chunk of this show. It was harmless fun. Why they never aired the last episode is beyond me (its like dropping out of college just before you're ready to graduate when you're short one class). My DVR 's hard drive went this spring and took the remaining episodes I hadn't seen with it. Oh well.

Six Degrees -- 1 Season/11 Episodes (5 Unaired) -- Never saw it, never will.

According To Jim -- 6 Seasons/145 Episodes -- We hardly knew ya.

Big Day -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/2 Unaired -- This sitcom was actually pretty funny. Centering around the hours leading up to a wedding, the cast of quirky characters is what made this work so well. ABC ended the show with two episodes unaired, but where they ended it seemed to give the show a sense of closure anyway. Maybe a DVD release will happen? And maybe monkey's will fly outta my butt.

The George Lopez Show -- 6 Seasons/120 Episodes -- Was this show really on that long??

Help Me Help You -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/4 Unaired -- Another quirky sitcom that failed to find an audience. Add it to the pile.

The Knights of Prosperity -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/4 Unaired -- This show deserved better. Quirky, hip and a lot of fun. Let's hope for a DVD release.

The Nine -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/6 Unaired -- Wanted to watch this. Still haven't. I have all the episodes aired on my laptop (got them off my Tivo before it self destructed back in February). Maybe someday I'll sit down and go through them.

What About Brian -- 2 Seasons/24 Episodes -- Never saw it.

Supernanny -- 3 Seasons/42 Episodes -- Between this and Nanny 911 I guess they fixed all the bratty kids in the world.

Traveller -- 1 Season/8 Episodes -- OK...the show has barely aired, but I don't expect the next 7 episodes to be such a ratings winner that ABC changes their mind. If they believed in this show it would have premiered back in September like originally intended. Interesting premise...I'll give a full review when the show's run is over.

MONDAYS
8pm Dancing With The Stars -- Returns for a fifth season
9:30 Sam I Am -- Christina Applegate stars in what is essentially a sitcom version of the movie Regarding Henry. You remember that Harrison Ford film where he gets shot in the head, can't remember who he is and has to relearn everything only to find out he wasn't a nice guy...this'll be a winner.
10pm The Bachelor -- This returns for an 11th go?? Yikes!

TUESDAYS
8pm Cavemen -- A sitcom based on the Geico Insurance commercials? I will personally shoot anyone I know who even bothers to try watching this.
8:30 Carpoolers -- Its about people who carpool to work. Meh. Jerry O'Connell & Faith Ford is what gets this show a one episode review.
9pm Dancing With The Stars -- This is the results show.
10pm Boston Legal -- Returns for a 4th season of wacky lawyer & fourth wall breaking hijinks. I've got a song in my head knowing this show's coming back...anyone wanna hear it???

WEDNESDAYS
8pm Pushing Daisies -- From Bryan Fuller (Heroes) and Barry Sonnenfeld (Men In Black) comes this new fantasy show about a guy who can reanimate dead matter -- even people. Stars Lee Pace, Anna Friel, Chi McBride, Swoosie Kurtz, Kristin Chenowith and is narrated by Jim Dale. Very much excited about this show.
9pm Private Practice -- The spin off from Gray's Anatomy. I don't watch that show, why would I watch this show? It's got an interesting cast...maybe a one episode try.
10pm Dirty Sexy Money -- Donald Sutherland and Peter Kraus star in this soap opera about a lawyer working for a rich family he finds evil. Blah.

THURSDAYS
8pm Ugly Betty -- Back for a second season of devil wearing prada fun.
9pm Gray's Anatomy -- Returns for a 4th Season.
10pm Big Shots -- Michael Vartan, Dylan McDermott and Christopher Titus star in this drama about a group of successful men and their inter-relations. The cast gets me watching for an episode. The concept needs to be stronger to keep me watching.

FRIDAYS
8pm Men In Trees -- Returns for a 2nd Season.
9pm Women's Murder Club -- based on a series of James Patterson novels...what no nursery rhymes? Its every currently running crime show wrapped in one. Blah.
10pm 20/20 -- I got nothing. Its back for a 4000th season.

SATURDAYS
8pm Saturday Night College Football

SUNDAYS
7pm America's Funniest Home Videos -- back once again for more guys taking shots to the nads.
8pm Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
9pm Desperate Housewives -- Season four had better bring this show back to what made it so entertaining. Although I still watch, I barely remember what that was now.
10pm Brothers & Sisters -- I hear its a good show, but I don't watch it. Back for a second season.

MONDAYS (Mid-Season)
8pm Wife Swap -- Why???
9:30 Sam I Am -- See the Mondays listing above
9:30 Notes From The Underbelly -- Back for a 2nd season. Haven't seen it.
10pm October Road -- Back for a 2nd Season. Haven't seen it.

TUESDAYS (Mid-Season)
8pm Cavemen
8:30 Carpoolers
9pm Cashmere Mafia -- Its Darren Starr's version of Candace Bushnell's Lipstick Jungle, just substitute Lucy Liu for Brooke Shields and get rid of Bushnell.
10pm Boston Legal

MIDSEASON
Miss/Guided -- The funny Judy Greer stars as a high school guidance counselor who now works at her alma mater and discovers that not much has changed...even her old popular nemesis is still around. I may watch because I think Greer is talented, but the premise is a bit flimsy.

Eli Stone -- Johnny Lee Miller stars as a lawyer who has halucinations. Its his supporting cast of Victor Garber, Natasha Henstridge and Loretta Devine that will get me to even sample the show.

Lost -- Returns for a shorter 4th season of 16 episodes (instead of 24). This season got off on such a wrong foot that I almost gave up on it. Luckily, it turned itself around even though it started getting a bit predicatble, at least it was moving forward again.

Oprah's Big Give -- Oprah gives away money. Where do I get mine?

Primetime -- The news magazine returns.

That's all for today. Tomorrow is CBS day.

Be seeing you.

Monday, May 14, 2007

NBC 2006-2007 Review/2007-2008 Preview

Well....its that time of year when the major TV Networks unveil their new shows for the fall season (something that seems to be more antiquated every passing year as consumers start "time shifting" shows with DVRs for later viewing and the Cable Networks roll shows out whenever they want)...so as per usual, I'll be looking back at this past season and ahead at next season on a network by network basis as each lineup is announced this week. Today is NBC Day.

GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN (At Least By A Few)
Andy Barker, P.I. -- 1 Season/6 Episodes -- Someday there will be peace in the Middle East. Around the same time Andy Richter will finally get a successful hit TV series as he so richly deserves. Hell might also freeze over.

The Black Donnelleys -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/7 Unaired -- Didn't watch it, but you've got to assume there was a reason this show never got picked up the first time around 2 seasons ago. Just because a guy wins an Oscar doesn't make a bad pilot better.

Kidnapped -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/8 Unaired -- This series got a bit of a lucky break in that NBC gave the production enough warning to wrap everything up (well...almost everything as there's one dangling plot thread, but its not a big deal). And even though it got removed from the schedule twice, NBC was gracious enough to have the episodes online for viewing. The whole series just came out on DVD and its a shame that there is nothing in the extras "post cancellation notice" as it all comes from just as the show started airing. Worth a look if only for the powerhouse talent that includes Jeremy Sisto, Delroy Lindo, Timothy Hutton, Dana Delaney and Ricky Jay among others.

20 Good Years -- 1 Season/10 Episodes/6 Unaired -- What a waste of talent. Hopefully, Lithgow and Tambor will learn from their mistakes.

Crossing Jordan -- 6 Seasons/117 Episodes -- I vaguely remember sampling this in its first season and not getting hooked. Apparently it became the Coach of dramas.

Grease: You're The One That I Want -- I'm sorry, but there's something wrong to me about letting America pick the next people to star in a Broadway remake. We can barely vote for President anymore.

Identity -- Penn Jilette has better things to do than host this silly "game show". Hopefully, he's back doing them.

Law & Order: Criminal Intent -- 6 Seasons/131 Episodes -- The best of the franchise (in my opinion) is gone from NBC, but not really gone. New episodes will be aired on USA starting this fall. NBC will air repeats two weeks later, I'm assuming on Saturday nights in their 2 hour block of repeats...this is a reverse of what had been going on for the last six years anyway...so this show is only on this list by a technicality.

Raines -- 1 Season/7 Episodes -- I've always liked Jeff Goldblum and this show was a nice showcase for the quirky actor. Not a great show, but very enjoyable (at least the episodes we've watched so far...the last couple are still on our Tivo). I'd love to see this get a DVD release.

The Real Wedding Crashers -- Ugh. 'Nuff said.

Thank G-d You're Here -- Didn't know what to think of this show, but caught an episode and found it rather amusing. Wish I had seen more, but what can you do. Oh well.

The Apprentice -- 6 Seasons/96 Episodes -- Let's hope Trump goes back to hiring and firing like a real businessman...off my TV set...I can't believe I actually watched the first FIVE Seasons of this show. What was I thinking?

Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip -- 1 Season/18 Episodes/2 Unaired as of now (show supposedly returns May 24) -- I thought this was one of the better shows to premiere this season. A bit too "insidery", but well written and well acted. This show never got the chance it deserved. Oh well.

NEW FALL SCHEDULE

MONDAYS
8pm Deal Or No Deal -- No thank you.
9pm Heroes -- The BEST new show of last season returns for a second round. Taking the concept of a serialized show and actually keeping an audience interested is the important point that Lost lost. This show never misses the beat and keeps you wanting more (in my case, I'd love Heroes Mini-Mates). Can't wait to see how this season ends. We're also getting 30 episodes instead of 24 if you count Heroes: Origins, a "spin-off" that will be used to lessen breaks in the schedule. Cool.
10pm Journeyman -- A reporter who can travel through time? From the creators of The West Wing? It'll get a one episode test from me and we'll go from there.

TUESDAYS
8pm The Biggest Loser -- Returns for a 4th Season.
9pm Chuck -- This comedy spy thriller comes from McG (director of the Charlie's Angels movies) and Josh Schwartz (creator of The O.C.). Could be fun...but let's see what else is still in this time slot as competition (House definitely, Veronica Mars hopefully). It will get a three episode test.
10pm Law & Order: Special Victims Unit -- The one part of this franchise I could just never get into returns for a 9th Season.

WEDNESDAYS
8pm Deal Or No Deal -- Still No Deal.
9pm Bionic Woman -- Jamie Sommers gets an upgrade that she may not need, but I'm game for three episodes based on the people behind the scenes (creators of The X-Files, the new version of Battlestar: Galactica and Kidnapped).
10pm Life -- A new cop show about a policeman returning to the force after serving time for a crime he didn't commit. Meh. Will get a one episode test.

THURSDAYS
8pm My Name Is Earl -- Returns for a 3rd Season. Yay!!!
8:30 30 Rock -- This off-beat comedy started off a bit wonky, but by mid-season found its voice and became one of the funniest shows on TV (even my wife started watching it again). Thankfully, its back for a second season and hopefully Alec Baldwin will still be with it.
9pm The Office -- Sorry...I know its coming back for a 4th Season, but I just don't care for the show. The British original was better and I like Steve Carrell in just about everything else.
9:30 Scrubs -- Back for its 7th (and last season), this show has started to stumble a bit this past year...so hopefully this next season will be the last.
10pm ER -- 14 Seasons?? Wow. Still don't care.

FRIDAYS
8pm 1 VS 100/ The Singing Bee -- The mildly entertaining game show hosted by Bob Saget returns for 8 weeks to be followed by 6 weeks of a new series that combines the idea of a spelling bee with karaoke. That sounds like fun, but will people watch every week? They'll be forced to once the writer's strike hits.
9pm Las Vegas -- This show's been on for 4 seasons?? For the fifth season, Sonny Corleone gets replaced by Magnum P.I.
10pm Friday Night Lights -- Didn't see the movie, don't care that the TV series got renewed for a second season, but happy for the fans of the show (though I wouldn't count on a third season with this being the timeslot).

SATURDAYS
8pm Dateline -- Cause three 24 Hour news channels don't cover enough crap.
9pm Reruns -- I expect Law & Order: Criminal Intent to air here after first runs on USA...along with reruns of other shows that are doing well for NBC.

SUNDAYS (In January after Football ends)
7pm Dateline -- Whatever
8pm Law & Order -- Coming into Season 18 does anyone really care anymore? I used to watch the show religously, but now if I miss an episode I miss an episode. Like many 18 year olds, maybe its time to kick this kid out of the house and make it get a real job.
9pm Medium -- This has become a show I watch on DVD only. So I'm still in season 2...I expect that season 4 may be the last for this show based on some behind the scenes turmoil I've heard about, high expenses and a new timeslot that puts it in play against some heavy competition (assuming ABC & FOX keep their schedules the same as they did this season).
10pm Lipstick Jungle -- Brooke Shileds, Kim Raver and Lindsey Price star in this adaptation of a book by Sex and the City author Candace Bushnell. Could be interesting...it'll get the three episode tryout from me for now (I reserve the right to make it a one episode tryout as we get closer to the actual series premiere).

MIDSEASON REPLACEMENTS
World Moves -- Its Ameircan Idol for hip hop dance teams. Blah.

The IT Crowd -- Based on a "Britcom", this show stars The Soup's Joel McHale as a tech guy for a large corporation. He's funny...so this gets a three episode tryout whenever it premieres.

Well...that's all for NBC. Tomorrow its ABC's turn.

Be seeing you.

Saturday, May 05, 2007

Swinging Back For The Lazy Days Of Summer

Hey folks,

I know it's been a while. And there are reasons (some good, some superfluous)...but I'll get to them a bit later...

I'm here to kick off the summer movie season with my review of Spider-Man 3.

I did have the opportunity to rewatch the first two films before trekking down to the theater for the latest one. They still hold up very well with the second film being just a smidge better than the first. Unfortunately, the new entry is not up to the same levels as the first two. Don't get me wrong, it's not X-Men 3 bad, but its not as good as the first two. You could put it on par with Fantastic Four in the sense that its a fun film to watch, but there are enough silly problems that could have been avoided to make it a GREAT film.

The "plot" is kind of all over the place as Peter Parker has decided to marry Mary Jane but several things get in his way. First, his best friend Harry Osbourne is trying to kill him (as revenge for killing his father), next an escaped criminal is terrorizing the city now that he has the power of manipulate sand, there's a new photographer trying to replace him at the Daily Bugle (with a girlfriend who Mary Jane's having issues with) and finally an alien from space bonds with Peter and brings out all the worst in him. Three villains, two girls and a split personality is a LOT to cram into two hours and twenty minutes (plus you've got to add Aunt May, the landlord and his daughter, the staff of the Daily Bugle, a new chief of police, a family to humanize the Sandman and the requisite Bruce Campbell cameo). Most of this is accomplised by a huge amount of coincidence.


The worst example comes towards the end when Sandman and Venom (the alien symbiote that eventually bonds with Peter's rival Eddie Brock...though nowhere is he called Venom in the film) decide to team up to destroy Spider-Man. It's a conversation that runs "You want to kill him, I want to kill him, together we're unstoppable". "Ok" and then we move on. It makes no sense from either character's standpoint (Sandman actually has a twinge of sympathy in his backstory). Add to that things like Gwen happens to be Peter's new lab partner, Eddie happens out of nowhere to a disaster scene to take pictures and walks right up to Chief Stacey who happens to be Gwen's father. And Gwen's the one in trouble at this disaster scene. Eddie happens to be in the same church where Peter finally rids himself of the alien. Flint Marko happens to fall into some scientific experiment when evading the police (which is what turns him into Sandman in the first place) and he also happens to be Uncle Ben's real killer (although this actually works by the end of the film). Harry gets injured in the opening battle and conveniently forgets a lot of things until he needs to remember it all later in the film?

That's a lot to have to swallow.

The action scenes are really well done. Whether its the first battle between Harry & Peter, the rescue of Gwen, the battles with the Sandman or the final four way battle between Harry, Peter, Sandman & Venom, all of the action scenes are edge-of-your-seat amazing.

As far as the acting goes, Kirsten Dunst seems a bit lost this time out. Tobey Maguire does a good job for the most part but has a couple of scenes (that are essentially musical numbers...don't ask) that ruin the film. James Franco does a great job advancing Harry this round and Thomas Haden Church does a great job humanizing Sandman. J.K. Simmons gets a few good scenes out of J. Jonah Jameson and Rosemary Harris does her best to keep Aunt May from becoming a Yoda clone that just appears to dispense advice.

Bryce Dallas Howard, Topher Grace and James Cromwell are all wasted as Gwen Stacey, Eddie Brock and Chief Stacey. Each has little to do and they all feel crammed in for no real reason.

Again, while the film is fun, it is flawed (and I'm really not sure how well the "musical" number plays...its very goofy and sticks out like a sore thumb). It could have been much better if they had concentrated on what worked best in regards to the villains (Harry and Sandman) and held anything else for a fourth film (Venom...BTW...did I mention I've never been a bit fan of this character).

Wait for the DVD to watch at home (even at a weekday afternoon matinee there were talking idiots and cell phone igniters...more on this subject soon).

I will be back sooner rather than later...

Be seeing you.