Thursday, May 19, 2005

FOX: Forwards and Backwards 2005

Before we get into FOX's new lineup, I'd like to mention two things...

First...Who's portrayal took a 3rd string comic villain that hadn't been seen in years and turned him into an A list fictional character??? I'd like to mention the passing of Frank Gorshin...while best known as The Riddler on "Batman", he was actually a very versatile impressionist and a very talented actor. His last appearance is apparently on the season finale of "CSI"(may have to break my boycott early just to check him out one last time). He will be missed.

Second...UPN's schedule is not really something I care much about. They're moving "Veronica Mars" to Wednesdays at 9pm which puts it up against "Criminal Minds" on CBS, "Head Cases" on FOX, "Lost" on ABC and "E-Ring" on NBC...meaning this is the time slot where every DVR and VCR in the house will be active trying to catch it all (well...I'm sure "E-Ring" and "Head Cases" won't last on my watch too long).

The rest of UPN's lineup is the same with the addition of a few new comedies (including one made by Chris Rock) and the moving of wrestling to Fridays where it'll be less embarassing.

Now...on to FOX's lineups...

Last May, FOX announced a three-pronged schedule for the 2004-2005 Season. It essentially started in June and ran through May with shows being jockeyed in and out over the course of the season. This year, we got a two-pronged schedule with the same concept. Although there are a few new shows starting this June that aren't part of this schedule, I'll be discussing them anyway...

On to cancelled shows:

There were three shows announced by FOX last year that never actually made it to the small screen...Athens, The Partner and Related by Family...lucky for us...I won't bother reminding you what they were about (you can find last year's post now on the website).

North Shore -- 1 Season/20 Episodes -- Didn't see it. Oh well. Too late now.

The Complex: Malibu -- 1 Season/8 Episodes -- Remember this? Me neither.

The Rebel Billionaire -- 1 Season/11 Episodes -- Sir Richard Branson tries to trump Trump and fails miserably.

Quintuplets -- 1 Season/22 Episodes -- Of all the shows, I'll miss this one the most. Andy Richter will someday have a successful show of his own that lasts for a while.

Method & Red -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/5 Unaired -- Caught one episode...didn't find it funny...apparently neither did anyone else.

The Next Great Champ -- 1 Season/10 Episodes -- Cause you can't see enough amateur boxing on TV.

The Jury -- 1 Season/10 Episodes -- It was what "Law & Order: Trial By Jury" should have been...but they're both gone and we miss out on something (not sure what).

Tru Calling -- 2 Seasons/26 Episodes/1 Unaired -- That's what Eliza Dushku gets for not giving fans a "Faith the Vampire Slayer" series...tossed around the schedule and cancelled before your final episode can air (add in a full second season order that was scaled back twice to become 6).

Life On A Stick -- 1 Season/Anywhere between 8 and 11 episodes/3 to 6 Unaired -- I'm not sure how many episodes were made of this quirky and bizarre show, but I hope FOX at least burns off the unaired ones.

Jonny Zero -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/5 Unaired -- The title reminded me too much of "Johnny Bago" from several years ago, so I didn't bother watching. Is that why no one else did either?

Point Pleasant -- 1 Season/13 Episodes/5 Unaired -- Oooohhhh....spooky...there's still 5 episodes of this crap laying around somewhere.

The Casino -- 1 Season/13 Episodes -- It's odd that FOX couldn't do more episodes of something that seems to have taken on a life of its own on Discovery & Travel.

Kelsey Grammar Presents: The Sketch Show -- 1 Season/6 Episodes/2 Unaired -- Apparently this may still be airing as someone's said something about the former Frasier star playing Beast in the next "X-Men" movie...that's a sketch for the show and not a real piece of news, right?

Oliver Beene -- 2 Seasons/24 Episodes/2 Unaired -- Remember this one? I had to really reach back to remember I think I may have actually seen most of the episodes that aired. I must get a life.

The Swan -- 2 Seasons/19 Episodes -- Apparently, there is a G-d...it just took him a while (19 episodes) to notice what we were doing before decreeing this disgusting waste of humanity get cancelled.

My Big Fat Obnoxious Boss -- 1 Season/10 Episodes/5 Unaired -- If it had been about Rupert Murdoch instead of a chimp it may have done better...or maybe it was about Murdoch anyway.

Who's Your Daddy -- 1 Season/?? Episodes/?? Unaired -- Only 1 episode of this reality series that had many adoption advocates joinging the NRA and attempting to gun down FOX executives ever aired. We should all be thankful that it didn't get any further...that's what soap operas are for.

Returning Shows:

Arrested Development -- 3rd Season -- FOX was smart to bring this GREAT show back for a third season...if you're not watching this...well...I've already used that threat about people not watching "Lost"...you should be watching this...let's hope Fox Home Video gets season 2 on DVD before season 3 starts to catch everyone up to speed. And now that its on Monday nights, you have no excuse...there's nothing else on.

House -- 2nd Season -- I just started watching this show...it was in a tough slot for us, but the one or two episodes I did catch I liked...so we'll catch up this summer (when we have nothing to do but change diapers).

That 70s Show -- 8th Season -- It looked like Bret Harrison of "Grounded For Life" was going to replace the departing Topher Grace...but Harrison's got his own new show starting mid-season (see "The Loop" below)...so I guess this aging comedy will just come back with whoever's left. Once upon a time it was fresh and smart and original...now it's just stale and boring...kind of like the 1970s.

Stacked -- 2nd Season -- While it's funny, I'd have prefered to see "Life On A Stick" or "Quintuplets" come back.

The OC -- 3rd Season -- Don't watch it, but it's nice to know George Lucas isn't beyond pimping his products on network TV shows that his kids like.

The Bernie Mac Show -- 5th Season -- Wow...a short 4th season that was barely funny actually led to a 5th season...I hope it improves.

Malcolm In The Middle -- 7th Season -- After "Arrested Development" this is the funniest show on TV. Hands down. It has been consistently funny since the first episode of the first season...something that hasn't been done since the first nine seasons of "Frasier". I hope they can keep it up (although the move to Fridays may spell the end for the show).

Cops -- 18th Season -- Come on everyone...sing a long...Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do when they come for you?

America's Most Wanted -- 19th Season -- Wow...and yet we still have crime.

King Of The Hill -- 10th Season -- This show, which I still love dearly, easily gets the first prize for "Coach" award (as in..."this is still on TV???")

The Simpsons -- 17th Season -- Okay...this is still my favorite show of all time, but even I can be critical of it when it's bad...the 15th season was bad...all over the place, silly, pointless bad...this last season was an improvement...but after this many years the writers are bound to run out of steam for a string of episodes. Even when it's bad, there's still plenty to quote though.

Family Guy -- 4th or 5th Season -- With FOX's new year round scheduling, the concept of seasons kind of goes out the window. New episodes of what is obviously the 4th Season just started...but we don't know when they'll end (same with "American Dad")...so that's why I've got my odd listing...more importantly...this show is still hysterically funny and very repeatable when it comes to watching episodes.

American Dad -- 1st or 2nd Season -- Unfortunately, this show isn't as funny as the other animated shows on FOX...but it's not "Fish Police" either...and it is growing on me...it's hit or miss at best...but I'm sure they'll find their stride here. It took "Family Guy" a while to find its sride.

American Idol -- 5th Season -- Come talk to me when the show starts trotting out good musicians and isn't destroying the concept of music as an art form.

New Shows:

Kitchen Confidential -- this sitcom based on the real life book by chef Anthony Bourdain is set in a restaurant and stars Bradley Cooper, Nicholas Brendon and John F. Daley. Could be good. I'll watch for a bit to see if it hooks me.

Prison Break This has the most intriguing premise, as like "Lost", I don't see how from the description it will sustain more than a season...but good luck trying...I'll watch. A man purposely robs a bank to get thrown in jail so he can help break his brother, who's on death row, out of prison with the use of the prison blueprints he has hold of. Dominic Purcell (of "John Doe"), Peter Stormare and Stacy Keach star.

Bones -- Emily Deschannel and David Boreanaz star in this procedural drama about a forensic anthropologist who assits law enforcement in solving crimes. The cast gets me to watch what's become a rather boring premise.

Head Cases -- Chris O'Donnell, Adam Goldberg and Rachel Leigh Cook star in this "dramady" about a lawyer who tries to rebuild his life after a nervous breakdown. Again, the cast gets a shot in spite of the premise.

Reunion -- This unique show follows the lives of a group of friends from high school graduation to their 20th Reunion. The timeline is apparently all over the prlace but mostly moves forward after starting at the funeral of one of them. Sounds very intriguing. It gets a few episodes from me.

The Gate/Deviant Behavior -- Depending on what you read they're not sure of the title...but it's a procedural drama. Yawn...but it does have Chi McBride in it.

The War At Home -- Look a sitcom about a disfunctional family. We haven't seen that in a while. Michael Rapaport and Anita Barone star.

The Loop -- Bret Harrison stars as the youngest executive of a company trying to set his priorities in life. Eric Christian Olsen, Mimi Rogers and Philip Baker Hall also star. Meh.

The Inside -- Rachel Nichols stars in this procedural drama about FBI agents who track serial killers. That would be a yawn if it weren't from the minds behind "Wonderfalls" and "Angel". I'm ready. Premieres June 8.

Hell's Kitchen -- didn't anyone at FOX watch "The Restaurant" on NBC? Premieres May 30.

The Princes Of Malibu -- Bruce Jenner's sons try and replicate what Paris & Nicole have done...they may as well try invading a country as well...it'd be just as entertaining with less casualties...what's left of American dignity should go up in flames with this one. Premieres July 10

So You Think You Can Dance -- It starts July 20 and is basically "American Idol" with dancers. Blah.

"Mid-Season" Replacements:

Nanny 911 -- 2nd Season -- If "Supernanny" is like Batman, then this must be the Commissioner Gordon of Nannies...sorry...I got nothing to say about this show. It just takes up space.

Trading Spouses -- 2nd Season -- Again...it'd be better if it was the porn the title suggests. It also just takes up space.

Freebirds -- It's about young people trying to figure out life after college. There's a novel idea for a sitcom.

The Simple Life -- 4th Season -- Okay folks...you want to know why every country on the planet HATES the U.S.? It's not our foreign policy...it's not our arrogant ways...it's not even jealousy of our freedoms...it's the fact that we have elevated the vapid bitch known as Paris Hilton into an uber-celebrity and worship at her alter. Until we rectify this issue we'll continue to be the scorn of everyone everywhere...and deservedly so.

Renovate My Family -- 2nd Season -- It's a step above "The Swan"...maybe they should just work on getting the Hilton sisters real lives?

Well...that's next fall...I'll be back in a few days with a breakdown of what I'm hoping to do about it (Malcolm...my son, not the TV series...may prevent it from becoming a reality since our lives our going to CHANGE FOREVER -- sorry...everytime someone tells me that I tend to equate it to an arm falling off...it's gotten a bit meaningless to us...but more on that as well in a few days).

I'll also give you a run down of summer shows and cable shows premiering and returning.

Be seeing you.

1 comment:

Kevin said...

WOO HOO! Arrested Development is still alive and kicking! This is easily one of my favorite shows on TV. In a very odd coincidence I just finished watching the Muppets version of the Wizard of Oz, and they have Jeffery Tamboor hiding under a chair, which I thought was great since that is really what he does in Arrested Development. :-)